Tag Archives: yourself

Lost between Diamonds, Makeup and Hairspray

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Today, if you were to check my Facebook page, I had a to do list all mapped out.  Well, somehow I got lost between posting that this morning bright and early and doting on myself.  I went from wanting to knock things off my list to spending some me time in a matter of minutes.  Will I get my list done today? Perhaps.

In life we get so caught up in pleasing those around us that we forget sometimes that we are just as important.  We need to take time for us before we are broken and battered and of no use to others.  I enjoy spending time with me.  I like to see what magic I can do with my hair and make up.  I like trying on clothes.  I like decorating myself with diamonds just for fun.  I guess what I am trying to say is simple:  I like me.

Now, I did not arrive to this position about myself overnight and the older I get the more I like myself and who I have become.  I have allowed God to change me from the inside.  The more I believe what His Word says about me, the more I am happy to focus on me so that I can encourage others to do the same!

My husband asked me this morning why I was so good to him.  Silly man, because I love you.  But I can honestly say that I am as confident in who I am today because of his love.  I was broken from a past relationship and it has taken time and a lot of healing for me to even say I like myself.  God used my husband to love me back together.  He picked up the broken pieces of my heart and gently and patiently helped me heal.  I wrote him this Facebook post today:

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God has used my husband to teach me the principle of loving myself.  When I do not feel good about who I am, then I am not very easily persuaded to help anyone else feel good either.  However, when I am confident in who I am, I can boldly help someone in need of a love tap.  I can lovingly tell someone who is down and out and beating themselves up that they are worthy of love and mean it.

So how do we begin the journey of falling in love with who we are so that we can be a blessing to others?  One step at a time.  One Bible verse at a time.  One minute for ourselves. One moment of encouragement can do a whole lot of good.  Sometimes I wish I could start my career over and just become a motivator, then I think about the people I may have impacted and perhaps I already have done that.

Last point:  the definition of love is an intense feeling of affection and the definition of yourself is you personally.  Put these two together and you get this:  Feeling intensely affectionate for you personally.  I know that sounds a bit strange but let’s look at it from God’s perspective:

God feels intensely affectionate for you personally because God is love.


Wow! How powerful is that statement?  Let that permeate through you right now.  Allow that to just sink right in.  When you realize the God of the universe is in love with who you are, it’s the first step to beginning to love you!

Dear God, I stand before you today with the knowledge that you love me personally.  Help me to receive that into my spirit.  Help me to see who I really am.  Let the love process begin in me today.  Show me something about who I am that I can love.  Thank You for accepting me just as I am, a work in progress.  I thank you for the revelation to come.  In Jesus Name Amen

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Define Love

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What is love?  What is your definition? What’s love got to do with who you are? Is love overrated? If you don’t have love are you worthless? If you do not have love for another are you evil?  If love isn’t enough than what is?  If you are alone, do you not possess love?  If you are not in a relationship, have you failed at love? I could fill this entire blog with the word love and it would lose it’s meaning really fast so let’s get to the nitty gritty of what love truly is.

First this is what Webster’s dictionary defines love as:

Simple Definition of love

  • : a feeling of strong or constant affection for a person

  • : attraction that includes sexual desire : the strong affection felt by people who have a romantic relationship

  • : a person you love in a romantic way

hmmmm…for the purposes of today’s blog I want to focus on the very first line.  What does it mean to have a strong and constant affection for a person? Also for the motive of this discussion I want to change person to reflect yourself.  Jesus says clearly several times in the Bible that we are to love our neighbor as we love ourselves but how can we do this if there is no existence of love for ourselves?

So many humans are wandering around this Valentine’s Day moping because they don’t have a husband or wife or a significant other to share this day of love with.  We as humans get so caught up in the drama of what holidays are supposed to mean that we lose out value for ourselves. We need to get back to the basics of love, ourselves.

Now, I know when some of you just heard that you got a little sad because you don’t have a clue how to begin loving yourself.  You have been so beaten and battered to this point in your life that there is no hope left.  You have been rejected one too many times.  You have been left out of certain circles.  You don’t seem to fit in anywhere.  You feel as if you have failed at life time and time again.  Why would you even want to love yourself, no one else seems to.

This is where change can begin to happen. You are not defined by anyone else’s definition of love.  You are defined by who God says you are.  The Bible says so many positive things about who you are.  Your are His beloved.  You are His righteousness.  You are worthy. You are loved. I do not have the time or space to list all of the great things the Bible says about you, I just wanted to graze the surface.  So how can you begin to love you?  First of all the best step to take is begin to recognize the lies you have been fed probably all of your life.

Often growing up is where we begin to listen and accept the lies of the enemy: You are not good enough to do that.  You did that completely wrong.  You will never be able to do that.  You will be lucky to finish high school.  You won’t get that part in the play.  You are not smart enough.  Lie after lie after lie after lie we believe and it begins to shape how we value ourselves.  If we don’t begin to love who we are, we will never be able to love others to the full capacity that Jesus calls us to.

So here are a few beginning steps to catapult you into loving yourself.  One, stop listening to the lies. Two, begin to accept the positive love from God’s Word and let it begin to define who you are.  Three, forgive those who fed you the lies. Four, practice loving yourself.  It’s okay to spend time with you.  It’s okay to do the things you enjoy doing.  It’s okay to accept the uniqueness that makes you who you are.  And five, apply grace to yourself.

Loving yourself is not an instant, overnight success.  Loving yourself will take time, so take all the time you need.  Once you begin to see yourself with God’s perspective you will begin to see a change in you.  A change for the better.  A positive change that will infect those around you and may even inspire some to do the same.  Whatever you do, don’t give up on you because God never will.

Dear God,

I give you permission today to reveal Your love to me in a way I have never seen before.  I ask that you would begin a new work in me and that I would begin to understand what loving myself is all about.  I thank You for accepting me just as I am right where I am.  I thank You that the work You have begun in me You will complete.  Help me to see the love You have for me clearly and without the lies from the enemy.  In Jesus Name, Amen

Dandelion Lives and Mashed Potatoes

Then Jesus went to work on his disciples. “Anyone who intends to come with me has to let me lead. You’re not in the driver’s seat; I am. Don’t run from suffering; embrace it. Follow me and I’ll show you how. Self-help is no help at all. Self-sacrifice is the way, my way, to finding yourself, your true self. What kind of deal is it to get everything you want but lose yourself? What could you ever trade your soul for?
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Like the seeds on a dandelion stem we are but skeleton remains of what we were before Jesus began to heal us.  We are but a ghost of the image of what once was our self.  As we begin to seek God for answers on how to be healed and become whole it’s like we just keep blowing on those seeds and soon they disappear into the wind until all that is left is a stem.  This is where the dying process should begin but we as self-help gurus, want to start right at the beginning and kill the life out of our weeds.  For you see a dandelion is a weed to a beautiful, well kept lawn and the first thing we do is get our the spray and begin to annihilate life before it can begin.  But to God there is beauty to be beheld in the dandelion.
We as humans do the same thing to ourselves sometimes when we come to know Jesus.  All of a sudden there is an awareness of the sins which have surrounded us.  We start a no smoking program.  We join the nearest AA to control our drinking issues.  We do our best to stop swearing.  We stop gossiping about others.  We try to be nice to all people.  We try to fix all the wrong relationships in our lives all at once.   We begin to forgive our mothers, sisters, fathers, brothers, aunts, uncles, teachers and the multitude of people who have hurt us since birth.  What do we forget in this process?  Our very own selves.  We tend to misunderstand that all of the sin natures we have will begin to dissipate as we allow God to heal our wounded hearts.
We get so caught up in getting our lives in order and in line with God and trying to live right that we completely forget that we need to heal.  We need to forgive ourselves.  We need to right the relationship with ourselves.  Some of you are scratching your heads right now because this seems so backwards.  Some of you are saying that it could never happen because you have done so many wrong things.  Others of you are saying, what does loving myself got to do with anything?
Loving yourself is the center of who you are.  God created you to have an intimate relationship with and if you are not in tune with who you are because you don’t even want to approach you because of all the unlove, then how will you ever have a right relationship with God?  If we are always running away from our own issues, how are we ever going to be healed?  I think that we are so busy trying to figure out life that we forget it’s all up to God.  We were created by Love itself.
We need to come to this realization that God does all the healing and fixing of us.  We just need to surrender our will to His plan.  We need to be obedient to that still small voice.  We have to begin to believe all of the promises God has for us in the Bible.  We need to come to the full understanding that God loves us and will never leave our side.  Healing is a process.  Somethings can be healed instantly while other issues in our lives just take time.  We live in a society of instant mashed potatoes and I think we expect that if we just had water, butter and some heat to a heap of flakes our lives will be all back together in a matter of minutes.
Stop running.  Just stand still.  Rest.  Relax.  Hear God say. “I love you”  ” I miss you”  “Come spend some quiet time with me”  He is waiting for you to just give up.  To finally be able to say to Him, “Here I am Lord, fix me, I am broken and unable to put me back together.”