Tag Archives: Valentine’s Day

Define Love


What is love?  What is your definition? What’s love got to do with who you are? Is love overrated? If you don’t have love are you worthless? If you do not have love for another are you evil?  If love isn’t enough than what is?  If you are alone, do you not possess love?  If you are not in a relationship, have you failed at love? I could fill this entire blog with the word love and it would lose it’s meaning really fast so let’s get to the nitty gritty of what love truly is.

First this is what Webster’s dictionary defines love as:

Simple Definition of love

  • : a feeling of strong or constant affection for a person

  • : attraction that includes sexual desire : the strong affection felt by people who have a romantic relationship

  • : a person you love in a romantic way

hmmmm…for the purposes of today’s blog I want to focus on the very first line.  What does it mean to have a strong and constant affection for a person? Also for the motive of this discussion I want to change person to reflect yourself.  Jesus says clearly several times in the Bible that we are to love our neighbor as we love ourselves but how can we do this if there is no existence of love for ourselves?

So many humans are wandering around this Valentine’s Day moping because they don’t have a husband or wife or a significant other to share this day of love with.  We as humans get so caught up in the drama of what holidays are supposed to mean that we lose out value for ourselves. We need to get back to the basics of love, ourselves.

Now, I know when some of you just heard that you got a little sad because you don’t have a clue how to begin loving yourself.  You have been so beaten and battered to this point in your life that there is no hope left.  You have been rejected one too many times.  You have been left out of certain circles.  You don’t seem to fit in anywhere.  You feel as if you have failed at life time and time again.  Why would you even want to love yourself, no one else seems to.

This is where change can begin to happen. You are not defined by anyone else’s definition of love.  You are defined by who God says you are.  The Bible says so many positive things about who you are.  Your are His beloved.  You are His righteousness.  You are worthy. You are loved. I do not have the time or space to list all of the great things the Bible says about you, I just wanted to graze the surface.  So how can you begin to love you?  First of all the best step to take is begin to recognize the lies you have been fed probably all of your life.

Often growing up is where we begin to listen and accept the lies of the enemy: You are not good enough to do that.  You did that completely wrong.  You will never be able to do that.  You will be lucky to finish high school.  You won’t get that part in the play.  You are not smart enough.  Lie after lie after lie after lie we believe and it begins to shape how we value ourselves.  If we don’t begin to love who we are, we will never be able to love others to the full capacity that Jesus calls us to.

So here are a few beginning steps to catapult you into loving yourself.  One, stop listening to the lies. Two, begin to accept the positive love from God’s Word and let it begin to define who you are.  Three, forgive those who fed you the lies. Four, practice loving yourself.  It’s okay to spend time with you.  It’s okay to do the things you enjoy doing.  It’s okay to accept the uniqueness that makes you who you are.  And five, apply grace to yourself.

Loving yourself is not an instant, overnight success.  Loving yourself will take time, so take all the time you need.  Once you begin to see yourself with God’s perspective you will begin to see a change in you.  A change for the better.  A positive change that will infect those around you and may even inspire some to do the same.  Whatever you do, don’t give up on you because God never will.

Dear God,

I give you permission today to reveal Your love to me in a way I have never seen before.  I ask that you would begin a new work in me and that I would begin to understand what loving myself is all about.  I thank You for accepting me just as I am right where I am.  I thank You that the work You have begun in me You will complete.  Help me to see the love You have for me clearly and without the lies from the enemy.  In Jesus Name, Amen


Got Love?

“For God loved the world so much that He gave his one and only Son, so that everyone who believes in him will not perish but have eternal life. John 3:16 NLT


Tomorrow is Valentines Day and all I heard today was sad stories about people having no Valentine…..how has this day become such a tragedy for so many people?  Why do we get so bound up about a silly holiday in the first place?  Yes I will admit I am happy to be sharing my first Valentines Day with my new hubby tomorrow, yet my heart is saddened by the amount of people who will be hurting because they have no one in their lives to share this day of love with.

My deepest desire as I am on this earth is to touch hearts for Jesus.  I wish I could show people how Jesus could be their Valentine.  My heart breaks for the ones who have arrived upon this season in their lives without any hope of every finding love.  My heart longs to show them that Jesus is the only true love to begin with and it is from His Father that we even have an understanding of what love is all about.

Love is simple.  God created it and we just took it to a whole other level.  He, the One who made love, IS love.  If we could only wrap our minds around this simple concept.  We were created solely for a relationship with God and through the love of the Father pouring into us we are able to love others as it is written in the Bible.  God never intended for us to create a day which would leave so many people hurting and hopeless.

Valentines Day should be a day when we share the love we have with others who are hurting. I am challenging anyone reading this whether you are married, single, divorced or separated or perhaps not even having a clue what real love is, to step out and show the love of Jesus to someone.  My prayer in doing this is that we will touch someone with the love of Jesus. John and I made Valentines on one of our date nights and we are taking them to a nursing home tomorrow as part of our Valentines Day.  I am excited to see what God will do with some simple paper Valentines.

So go buy a box of Valentines or some candy and find yourself out in public on Valentines Day and go where God leads you.  You will be surprised at what He can show you.  Search out the lost and the hurting.  Look for the down and out.  Sometimes all someone needs is a smile, a hug or a simple hello.  Are you willing to make a difference this Valentines Day?  Are you ready to do something about being sad this year?  It is time for us to get our of our comfort zones and see what God has in store for us as we step out in faith.

No Matter What, It’s Valentine’s Day

Psalm 13:5
But I trust in your unfailing love. I will rejoice because you have rescued me.

This blog is for all those who find themselves without a Valentine this year.  I know the world has just suddenly burst into shades of red, pink and purple.  The aroma of flowers wafting through the air, leaving its’ trail of perfume.  The sight of chocolate in a heart shaped box brings excitement to the taste buds at a glance.  There are cards galore and little surprises popping up everywhere.  Some may be asked for their hand in marriage and still others celebrate anniversaries.  Children are excited about their little valentines and about the party at school.  AND then, there are the broken hearted, lonely, unattached people who seem to either be angry because it is Valentine’s Day or just terribly depressed.  Some are so numb because it is there first holiday without a loved one who has passed on.  Others still just want revenge on those who are happy today or are so blinded by jealously they can’t see straight.

No matter the circumstances, it is still going to be Valentine’s Day from 12:01 am and for the next 24 hours after that.  You can’t avoid it.  It will come every year you are alive.  Sure you can hide under the covers or runaway to some secluded piece of land in the next town, but it will still be Valentine’s Day everywhere.  So, now that we decided that…..let us examine and come to a conclusion on how to find some peace in this day.  When my husband and I were together we had agreed that Valentine’s Day was not something we would really celebrate.  Sure we got something for the kids and sometimes we would get each other cards, but for the most part we did not see the sense in this holiday, yet I watched the rest of the world fall in love every February 14th.  And suddenly I felt all left out.

Even though we decided not to celebrate, I have to admit I would have liked some flowers at work or a big box of chocolates.  I always said that Valentine’s Day was over rated and just another way for someone else to make money, but I think somewhere deep down inside I was the jealous one watching from afar as others got taken out for dinner and got beautiful roses and tasteful treats.  Perhaps I was just like the rest of the world, looking for love in the superficial worldly view of love.  Not the real stuff, but the kind of love that money bought.  Momentary happiness and temporary acceptance.  Why was I so interested in that?  What I really needed was true, unbiased love from my husband but he was strung out on drugs most of the time and I never had his full undivided attention.  I don’t know who I was fooling anyways, we never had any money for anything fancy on Valentine’s Day, but I wanted more than what I receiving.

Wow!  I hit that on the head just now…..we always want more than we are receiving.  We see what the world is offering everyone else and we want it too.  Maybe all I needed was a hug or someone to stay up long enough to watch a movie, but I wanted a dozen yellow roses delivered to work instead because it would make it seem to the world that everything was alright.  I wanted a mushy card to read in my lonely times that would remind me of what love used to be for me.  I longed for what I no longer had a hold of and that is why I had to find a new approach to Valentine’s Day before I lost my mind completely and my broke into a million pieces.  I needed an answer to my loneliness and the feeling of emptiness I was experiencing.  I desired something substantial and long lasting, something that did not come in a red velvet box or come wrapped in a pretty bow and cellophane.  My heart ached for something more, glad I found a solution.

John 3:16.  For God so LOVED the world.  Bam!  Just like that, I had all I needed to make Valentine’s Day tolerable and it really began to change my mind set about this holiday forever.  Instead of celebrating the world’s idea of love, I could share the love of Jesus with those who need it more than they needed a fancy Valentine.  Jesus is with you all the time and He never leaves you or forsakes you.  He gives you the desires of your heart and brings you new beauty each morning.  He delivers flowers to the meadows everyday somewhere in the world.  He orchestrates the birds to sing melodies.  He heals the hurts we have inside and does not take it personally.  He is always listening and finds time to spend with you.  He does not hold a grudge against us if we don’t spend enough time with Him.  He accepts us for who we are and gives us more than we deserve at times.  What better Valentine is there?

So now when the Red Holiday comes around, I think about the blood of Jesus and how it covers it all.  I no longer get jealous when someone gets this huge bouquet of flowers or a big stuffed animal; I actually get happy because it is making someone else smile.  I appreciate the little things in life more.  I am able to tell others to have a Happy Valentine’s Day and actually mean because my thoughts are higher now and my eyes are on Jesus and I know He loves me right where I am.  I have all I need because I am secure in my relationship with the One True Valentine, Jesus.  Won’t you let Him be your Valentine too?