What is love? What is your definition? What’s love got to do with who you are? Is love overrated? If you don’t have love are you worthless? If you do not have love for another are you evil? If love isn’t enough than what is? If you are alone, do you not possess love? If you are not in a relationship, have you failed at love? I could fill this entire blog with the word love and it would lose it’s meaning really fast so let’s get to the nitty gritty of what love truly is.
First this is what Webster’s dictionary defines love as:
Simple Definition of love
: a feeling of strong or constant affection for a person
: attraction that includes sexual desire : the strong affection felt by people who have a romantic relationship
: a person you love in a romantic way
hmmmm…for the purposes of today’s blog I want to focus on the very first line. What does it mean to have a strong and constant affection for a person? Also for the motive of this discussion I want to change person to reflect yourself. Jesus says clearly several times in the Bible that we are to love our neighbor as we love ourselves but how can we do this if there is no existence of love for ourselves?
So many humans are wandering around this Valentine’s Day moping because they don’t have a husband or wife or a significant other to share this day of love with. We as humans get so caught up in the drama of what holidays are supposed to mean that we lose out value for ourselves. We need to get back to the basics of love, ourselves.
Now, I know when some of you just heard that you got a little sad because you don’t have a clue how to begin loving yourself. You have been so beaten and battered to this point in your life that there is no hope left. You have been rejected one too many times. You have been left out of certain circles. You don’t seem to fit in anywhere. You feel as if you have failed at life time and time again. Why would you even want to love yourself, no one else seems to.
This is where change can begin to happen. You are not defined by anyone else’s definition of love. You are defined by who God says you are. The Bible says so many positive things about who you are. Your are His beloved. You are His righteousness. You are worthy. You are loved. I do not have the time or space to list all of the great things the Bible says about you, I just wanted to graze the surface. So how can you begin to love you? First of all the best step to take is begin to recognize the lies you have been fed probably all of your life.
Often growing up is where we begin to listen and accept the lies of the enemy: You are not good enough to do that. You did that completely wrong. You will never be able to do that. You will be lucky to finish high school. You won’t get that part in the play. You are not smart enough. Lie after lie after lie after lie we believe and it begins to shape how we value ourselves. If we don’t begin to love who we are, we will never be able to love others to the full capacity that Jesus calls us to.
So here are a few beginning steps to catapult you into loving yourself. One, stop listening to the lies. Two, begin to accept the positive love from God’s Word and let it begin to define who you are. Three, forgive those who fed you the lies. Four, practice loving yourself. It’s okay to spend time with you. It’s okay to do the things you enjoy doing. It’s okay to accept the uniqueness that makes you who you are. And five, apply grace to yourself.
Loving yourself is not an instant, overnight success. Loving yourself will take time, so take all the time you need. Once you begin to see yourself with God’s perspective you will begin to see a change in you. A change for the better. A positive change that will infect those around you and may even inspire some to do the same. Whatever you do, don’t give up on you because God never will.
I give you permission today to reveal Your love to me in a way I have never seen before. I ask that you would begin a new work in me and that I would begin to understand what loving myself is all about. I thank You for accepting me just as I am right where I am. I thank You that the work You have begun in me You will complete. Help me to see the love You have for me clearly and without the lies from the enemy. In Jesus Name, Amen