Tag Archives: empty

Faith Zero

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[ Faith in What We Don’t See ] The fundamental fact of existence is that this trust in God, this faith, is the firm foundation under everything that makes life worth living. It’s our handle on what we can’t see. The act of faith is what distinguished our ancestors, set them above the crowd.
Ever been so lost at sea that you are being tossed to and fro and lose all sense of where you are?  Ever been driving in a storm and lightening is flashing and thunder is crashing all around you and your body is on high alert of danger?  Ever gone to a new school and as all the unfamiliar faces gawk at you in curiosity you feel unwanted and unliked?  Well, this is what life is without faith.  Without faith nothing is possible.  Faith is how we get closer to God and it is the very substance that brings us into the presence of God.
When my faith was at zero I could not make heads or tails of my life.  I was standing in a dirt storm chocking on everything that hit me.  My eyes hurt because of the debris.  My lungs were working over time to catch up with the fear racing through my body.  I could not see God.  I could not see anything good in my life.  I felt doomed to die right where I had chosen to be.  Now that might sound a bit dramatic but when you get to the point in your life where you feel that you must fix all of your mistakes before God can change your life, that’s how it feels.
Empty. Exhausted. Alone. Depressed. I begin to seek God.  I wanted out of my mess.  I wanted to feel what life felt like again.  I longed to smile.  I longed to be carefree.  I had this burning desire within me to move beyond my past, yet I could not make sense of the broken, shattered heart laying before me.  Where do I even begin to let God into my mess?
With one teeny tiny seed of faith.  One moment of surrender on my lips.  One whispered sentence into the surrounding darkness, “I’m sorry Lord, please forgive me.”
My life has been dramatically changed in five short years because I chose to believe God was bigger than any mess I could have ever gotten myself into.  God is bigger than addictions.  God is bigger than abuse.  God is bigger than neglect.  God is bigger than shame.  God is bigger than sin.  God is bigger than regret.  God is bigger than pain.  God is bigger than any bad decision I ever made.
Today I can hold my head up and be thankful for my word of the year: FAITH.  I look forward now to what God can and will do in my life.  My marriage, children, job and christian walk are all in His hands and I just need to rest in the knowledge of who He is.  Yes. Rest.
Dear God,  I thank You and praise You for bringing me to such sweet freedom in knowing who You are.  I pray that You will keep me on track.  I long to Linger in Your sweet Presence.  Lord, I pray for those who are reading this today that they will begin to believe that You are bigger than anything in their life right now.  I pray all will find rest in You today.  Thank You for being bigger than life to us.
In Jesus Name.  Amen.
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Empty Glasses

Joel 1:17

The seeds die in the parched ground, and the grain crops fail. The barns stand empty, and granaries are abandoned.
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Sometimes we fail.  Often we say the wrong things before we can close our mouths.  Maybe we pushed someone away because they did not see things the way we do.  Perhaps we just closed our eyes and prayed for the best.  It’s like taking an empty glass to a desert, planting a seed and expecting it to grow and be fruitful.  When we come at something empty, we produce an empty and broken atmosphere.  Yes I am speaking my heart right now as I look across certain circles in my life and find that I am missing several friends who once were close.  What happened?  Was I the empty glass?  Did I not have a desire within me to nurture life?
I probably could spend all night listing all of the things I could have possibly done in the past to hurt others or to make them want to leave my life.  I  admit I am not the best at making friendships work.  It’s not selfishness or pride, it’s just I get tired of trying to be the good guy.  I want to love like Jesus does with all that compassion and grace and I have a desire to love people right where they are at…..yet…..I fail.  Why? Maybe I still have some brokenness.  Maybe I am just too busy.  Maybe I just don’t know what to say or do in certain situations and people think I have just let them go.
This is me.  I am a product of revival.  A creation only God could make.  I am who I am, faults and all.  I am a kind of love me or let me person be I guess.  I have so many things consuming my life right now…work, family, church….how do I make it all balance and still work on relationships?  Let’s get Biblical for a moment.  What did Jesus command us to do right before He left us?  To love one another and spread the Good News.  Are we really filling those shoes if we walk around with empty glasses?
What exactly is an empty glass?  Well, judgments, bitterness, unforgiveness, grudges, feeling unloved or unaccepted, mistrust, not letting the past go, misunderstandings, hatred, religion…..I could go on but it’s not pretty.  What fills those glasses? Grace.  How many of us have empty glasses?  I have lost several friendships in the recent past due to my new marriage.  What?  Am I not happy and content and still following after God with all I am? Am I perfect at it?  Nope.  Do I do my best? Perhaps not always.  Am I allowing God to change me as I go?  You betcha!  Maybe that’s wrong with me….I am too surrender.
How silly does that sound?  Too surrendered.  I guess what I am trying to get to is quite simple, I don’t want to be an empty glass and if I have been that to anyone reading this, I stand asking for forgiveness.  I miss my friends.  I miss the passion we once shared for God.  I long for my glass  to be overflowing so that wherever I go I will water the ground.  I want to be a source of strength for someone else.  I want my life to matter for God.
We as a body of Christ need to learn how to step in and stand beside our sister or brother even if we don’t always understand what God is doing in their lives.  We need to love them right where they are and not judge them.  We need to love one another not because we are perfect at being Christians, but because we recognize we all have pain.  We all have past hurts.  We all made wrong choices sometimes.  We need to learn to seek God in the matters before us and not with our own wisdom.  Yes, as Christians following after God we need to learn how to tell people that Jesus loves them no matter what and we should be able to do the same.
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Lord, fill my glass to overflowing.  Change what you need to change in me.  Give me the compassion to love.  Show me how to be a friend.  Let me not grow weary in sharing who You are to others.  Allow me to leave a river of You wherever I go.  Teach me Your ways Lord and give me wisdom to speak the right words.  Thank you for the grace which fills my glass to overflowing each time I come to you.